You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize