no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
