I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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