Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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