a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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