Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
