four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
So apparently I’m into choking now
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize