ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
