it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
