kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
