The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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