He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
