tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
