dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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