i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
