so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
