At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
