Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
