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I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
my being single is dangerous.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
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