The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
