I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
