sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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