We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
