You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
