We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
