# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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