actually, I'm a sock model
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
