He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
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