I didn't shave. On purpose
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
