I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Randomize
