if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
These tits shall not be calmed
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
