Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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