His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Randomize
