i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
He shit in the fireplace
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Your penis caused this!
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
