I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
