yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
