It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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