Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
