I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
My bed smells like the plague
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