It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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