May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
