Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize