everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
