Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize