oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
