Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
