i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So many bounce houses so little time
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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