Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
