is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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