so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
