Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
